As a Real Yoruba Girl: Aso-Oke Love

Okay I know what this looks like, you think I have once again desserted you and neglected my baby but I promise I haven't! This time I have a legit excuse, I've been out of the country and without wifi for about a week or so; I went to the heart of Ondo Kingdom, Nigeria for my granddads' funeral and though it was generally  time of extremely mixed emotions let's focus on the not so sad shall we? My Warrior Angel would have wanted it no other way!

It's been more than a while since I last dressed up in the full Yoruba attire but this past week I must have worn all the different types of aso-oke (top cloth) in Ondo! from the lovely purple and pink in alari, to the subtle gold in sanyan and the deep blue of etu!

Pink, pearls and alari, excuse the messy room in the background, that is what happens when you put six females together AND make them rush to get dressed quickly everyday! This is a typical yoruba traditional outfit, the head piece is called a gele, the top is a buba and the wrap around skirt is called an iro. I'm missing my iborun in this picture which is another piece of cloth, the same as the gele that is wrapped around your waist but you can kind of see it on my Aunt in the background. Trust me when I say there is no rushing this outfit! The gele (head piece) will be tied to perfection!

Gold, corals and sanyan and the massive necklace around my neck is called an 'igbaku'. I think it's only used at funerals if I remember rightly.

My brothers and cousin in sanyan agabadas (the long gown over the trousers), filas (men's hats) and igbakus. Those agbadas are heavy! I never realised how much so until I tried using one as a duvet!

Cute lil cuz in his own mini agbada

The girls in lilac and purple, honeslty I don't even remember what this outfit was for!

Sleeping in church. tut-tut!

After this trip I have a really deep love for aso-oke now! I always hated wearing it before but I think I have been well conditioned to it, I've even gone as far as daydreaming on what my aso-ebi (family cloth) for my wedding will be made out of and what colour it will be! just have to learn to tie my own gele so that poor Aunty Toju doesn't have to tie about 20 every morning the next time the whole family gathers God bless her soul! Once again I'm sorry I left you for so long! Hopefully you see that I haven't just ditched, thanks to all my readers for always coming back and to my favourite anonymous commenter and all the readers in Russia, thank you especially!

P.S: Posting this month might continue to be sparse as I prepare for summer exams but I will try very hard to not leave for too long again! Blogging is a nice study break. :)

Reni x

Larger than Life: My Very Own Warrior Angel

Today was just one of those days for me... Not the good kind where you're unnecessarily jovial for no apparent reason, the other kind; where you're just a bit blue. Well I'm more than a bit blue and I'm not quite sure what I'm even doing here but I know that writing has always been the best outlet for me, I'm not much of a talker tbh so throughout today when people have been calling and texting to wish my family and I their condolences I've been at a complete loss of what to say except a measly "thank you". It's not that I don't care for condolences, I do... I think my mind is just still in a state of shock, first I heard but didn't quite understand, then I understood but didn't quite believe and now that no-one has called my phone to say "gotcha!" and the day is almost over I think that maybe it's true? But it can't be.

My grandfather can't be... gone. It's weird I still haven't been able to say it out loud, I can scream it out loud in my head but whenever I have to talk about it I'd rather say "about grandpa and stuff..." I've done my fair share of crying and wailing and asking why it had to happen this way but I'm trying to realise that although he's not physically here, nothing can touch the memories I was so so fortunate to create with him, . So this post isn't about mourning and loss, it's a mini toast to my Gramps, a celebration of a life well lived! Here's just a few of the things I will never forget about my very own Warrior Angel in Heaven (because he is way too full of energy to be just a guardian)

1. The way he loved all of his grandchildren and we loved him even more, he always taught us that family was the most important thing, second to nothing! 

2. Going to his house in Ondo almost every year for his birthday and having a 3-5 day party. No one could throw a party like my Gramps! Asun for days!

3. The way he called all of us by our first and last names every time he saw us, kind of instilling pride into us. He always said a good name was the most important thing anyone could have.

4. The way he was so proud of me for going to University of Manchester because my mum went there too and so did he. Almost every time I spoke to him he would say "Have you told them that you are third generation at Manchester yet? I'm sure not many people can claim that!" No they can't Gramps, no they can't.

5. Him getting cable tv and internet in his house so whenever we, the grand kids, came over to play we weren't bored.

6. Going on a massive family holiday to Spain with him when I was probably about 7/8, it was the most amazing villa ever. Barbados was meat to be next, but now we have Heaven instead which I'm sure is infinitely better!

7. His velvet slippers. Yup, gramps was rocking the velvet WAY before it was cool!

8. All his traditional necklaces, bejewelled walking sticks and embroided caps, dressing up was so much fun at his place!

9. His love for life... I've never met another person so exuberant and who had as much confidence as he did, so full of passion and a real lust for life and adventure. A perfect role model to me and everyone else.

As difficult as this is, it's time for me to wipe away my tears, or at least have less of them anyways. You would have never wanted it to be this way, I love you Grandpa and I won't ever stop missing you. Rest in Peace.

Grandpa, Grandma and all the cousins in 2009. Thank you for making us take another family portrait this Christmas, it's a shame I can't find it right now.