Thursday, 27 September 2012

Let's Play A Game


Hey beautiful people, so I've been suffering a seemingly incurable bout of writer's block but on the train last night I think I was finally cured! Wrote a short story so read and comment please! It's partly inspired by Rihanna's "Russian Roulette".
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She could feel the sweat dripping down her face as she slowly regained consciousness; small beads forming on her forehead and then trickling down her face slowly, like lazy raindrops on the window, eyes flitting open. “How did I get myself into this mess?” she wondered. Her head was pounding where someone had struck her. Hard. “She’s waking up boss” she heard a man say in a voice that was too high pitched to be respectable. She wanted to laugh but her breath caught in her lungs. Her chest ached. Looking down she realised had been bound hands and legs, and there was duct tape firmly around her mouth. “What should I do with the haggard thing?” the voice said again. Ashleigh tried to remember how she had gotten here in the first place, the last thing she could remember was getting into a rich guys car. He drove a Maserati and she felt lucky to be the one to service him that night

“Hey Mistuh, you need a lady friend for the night? I only charge £1000 till the morning and I can do you nine ways from Sunday,” she cooed in her southern drawl, shoving herself through the open window, cleavage first. It was well after dusk and the streets were cold. Business was slow and she would do anything to climb into this matte black car and be carried off into his swanky apartment somewhere uptown, never mind what she might have to do for the next few hours. “Really? All nine ways?” his voice was a rich deep alto and she could feel the vibrations in her ear as he spoke. “Yessir, maybe even more” she offered, snapping her gum and smiling flirtatiously, playing coy because she knew what men like this wanted. It wasn’t that she liked doing this… ‘job’, but sometimes there was simply no other way to pay the bills. She only worked the streets when she needed to, when her three year old could no longer eat broth consisting mainly of water and cried for some meat or bread, sadly this was becoming more and more frequent, she even had a couple of regulars. “Well hop in then, but I’m only giving you £300 no more.” He said with a smile “That’s still higher than some f*ckers offer so I’m in.” she thought as she clambered into the car, feeling the cold leather seats on her thighs.

Now the same alto voice was saying “Leave her for now, wake them all up first.” For the first time Ashleigh realised there were other people around her. Girls dressed almost exactly like her; scantily clad, some stripped down to their underwear, obviously ladies of the night. She saw the guy with the high-pitched voice, he was stout and dressed like an undertaker, even including the hat. He went around the room brutally kicking and slapping all the girls until they were all on their feet. There were about 8 of them, all tied up with lips that had been sealed. “Now, now Caleb, don’t be so harsh, they have enough punishment waiting for them.” The alto voice said, reverberating through the room.

Ashleigh wondered where they were, all she could make out was that it was unfinished and the concrete on the floor grazed her bare legs constantly, there were also a few sparsely spaced windows. It must be a warehouse of some sort. The voice sounded even closer than it was before as it spoke. He was standing in front of one of the girls. “So tell me your name sweetheart” the hooker stood shaking before him speechless. “Very well then, let me explain the rules of my little game to you.” Emerging completely out of the darkness to reveal his 6 foot 5 frame, with a wry grin he said. “It is my job as a bearer of the light, to rid the world of all things sinful and all things immoral and you my dear, all of you,” he says looking intently at each one of them “are both sinful and immoral” Ashleigh watched as he ran a finger carelessly down the hookers face and stopped right at the end of her breastbone, in between her breasts. “Because of your undignified means of living, I have chosen you to play this little game with me, oh don’t cry darling, it might all be quite alright in the end.” He smiles slightly as he watches the hooker shake with fear, then he jab her forcefully in the chest with two fingers. The girl doubles over and falls, completely out of breath. “You simply must choose between 2 options. Caleb, show them the games rooms.” With that the lights went off again and there was an image cast on the wall directly in front of them. From what she could make out, there was a table with a gun on it.  She could hear the baritone voice explaining the rules of the game, and the game was Roulette. There was only one cartridge in the gun. Anyone who managed to survive would be allowed to leave and everyone else… could finally meet her maker. The only catch was a pack of rabid dogs just through another door, waiting to devour anyone who took more than two minutes to pull the trigger. Ashleigh felt sick to her stomach; this job cannot be the reason for her being here right now.

She closed her eyes and began to remember all the decisions that had brought her to this place. Dating Chris, the neighbourhood bad boy even when her father told her not too. Falling out with her mother after she failed to side with her. Isolating herself from all her siblings as she claimed they had all never been in love before. Her decision to move out of her parents house at the age of 17 and live with Chris instead. Loosing her inhibitions one night and indulging fully in his pleasures. Staying with him even after he beat her continuously. Getting pregnant and dropping out of school to have his baby. Chris eventually kicking her and her baby out of the house no matter how she pleaded. Meeting a woman who got her started in the ‘business’, getting her her very first client. Wondering to a perfect world in her mind while different men constantly filled her womanhood; old, young, poor, rarely rich. Nothing good had come out of this and all Ashleigh could think of was her baby girl, sleeping in the dingy apartment. She could only hope someone would save her.

All of a sudden there was a loud bang and then a thump on the floor as the first girl’s body went down. She saw Caleb drag the lifeless body out of the room “Feed her to the dogs” the alto voice said. “Yes boss” answered Caleb. Shivering convulsively and crying at the sight she shut her eyes tight again and thought of her perfect world. Another bang and another thud. Dreams of bright summer days and white Christmases were interrupted by a hand placed firmly on her shoulder. “You’re next” She looked at him with all the light left in her soul and pleaded with her eyes for him to let her go. Her deep brown eyes swam in tears waiting to fall at the bat of an eyelid, but all she was met with were cold black eyes, devoid of any emotions. Caleb grabbed her roughly and she wriggled and thrashed about trying desperately to be freed. Four slaps in rapid succession met her cheek, life had dealt her a heavy blow. Now locked in the room she stares at the revolver, her only escape. Picking up the cold lifeless gun like the eyes she had just seen her hands begin to shake. She stares into the barrel and realises they look exactly like the eyes she has just seen. Her knees buckle and she sinks slowly to the ground. “Only 1 more minute before my puppies come in to play.” says the voice through the speakers. “There are some truly sick people in this world” she thought as she spins the cylinder. “Better to take your chance with the gun than the dogs.”

“30 seconds”

Clicking the cylinder into place, she wills her hand and her heart to be still.

“20 seconds”

She raises her eyes to heaven and says a silent prayer to anyone who might be listening.

“10 seconds”

She lifts the gun slowly to her temple and feels it ice cold on her skin.

“9... 8… 7… 6…”

Slowly and deliberately she squeezes the trigger.

Thursday, 6 September 2012

Red Skies


One of my more recent poems, would really appreciate some feedback so leave some comments please! :) 

Red skies at night, sailors delight;
Thoughts of azure mornings,
Stretching for thousands of miles.
In his eyes I see love, desire and pleasure
Sure as the days promised light,
Nothing can spoil this,
In him, is the rest of me.

Red skies in the morning, sailors warning;
Clouds, dark and roaring take over the skies.
What has become of my lovers tongue?
Should he spew venom alone?
Of lust, anger and debauchery?
Whatever happened to his warm eyes?
I do not recognize him.

Tonight my sky is starless,
Charcoal as the demon,
That painted it so.
My heart is restless,
It beats an unsteady rhythm like the lips of my lover;
One moment cursing,
And the other caressing.

Oh how I long for the dusk to come,
Where I shall reunite with my scarlet knight.

Sunday, 2 September 2012

Staying Single: Part 10- The Finale II

Previous Posts
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Woman: Gyal ima need you to get outta hya. I can’ hev you stinkin’ up d pliayce, get a cab and go ‘ome hunny.

Embarrassed and still feeling sick, Kemi lumbered out of the ladies and through the masses of people till she got outside. She called Remy.

Remy: Giiiirl, what’s up?

Kemi: **sobbing** Hey, I think I messed up

Remy: Kemi are you crying? What’s wrong? Where are you?

Kemi: **spluttering** I’m walking down King’s Road, looking for a taxi.

Remy: No, go back to the club, just wait outside, I’m coming to meet you there right now okay? Kemi did you hear me? It’s not safe to walk about by yourself.

Kemi: Okay.

Her chest ached, her tongue was parched and there were trails of black mascara winding all the way down her face, she looked like an evil clown. Walking back towards the club she hears her name being called but decides to ignore it, she can’t have anyone see her like this. Maybe I should go back into the bathroom at the club till Remy gets here. But the voice just grows louder and she can hear footsteps quickening behind her. Someone grabs her arm and she jumps, trying to shake free. Through her misty, tear filled eyes she sees none other than the Ex, staring down at her face in confusion.

Oh gosh, I’m really not in the mood for this boy to come and rub things in my face. Can this night get any worse??

But surprisingly, seeing her tearful face and dishevelled hair the Ex feels nothing but compassion for her.

The Ex: Kemi what’s wrong with you? I saw you walking up the road; I was just on my way out.

What is wrong with me is you, you’re the one who broke up with me and left me feeling foolish and vulnerable and now I don’t know how to be happy with any other person because I’m still so messed up from you!

Holding her hand the Ex looks at her again

The Ex: Kemi talk to me. Or at least let me get you home.

Kemi: It’s okay; Remy is on her way to get me now. She’s coming with Jide.

The Ex: But Remy lives all the way at London Bridge, it would take them forever to get here. Call her now, tell her to just go to your house, I’d drop you there.

Kemi had forgotten how far away Remy was and seeing no other options but to stand here and awkwardly talk to the Ex while she waited, she decided to allow the Ex to take her home.

In the taxi

The Ex, genuinely concerned about her well being asked, “So are you going to tell me what happened?” Looking him straight in the eye as if to imply that all of this was his fault Kemi replies “I’m just confused, I keep messing up when it comes to guys, picking the wrong ones and letting the good ones get away. “ The Ex slightly uncomfortable at being put on the spot shifted about awkwardly. “Kemi you just have to know what you want and go for it. You always take the long way round things. I’m guessing things aren’t so great with the Suitor?” Kemi, taken aback by the truth in his words and the tenderness in his voice began to sob again.

The Ex: Kemi please don’t cry. It makes me uncomfortable when girls cry; I never know what to do.

And with that he puts his arm around her shoulders and allows her to cry into his chest, deep heavy sobs that eventually subside into whimpers, all the while trying to comfort her. Her phone rings;

The Ex: Hey, it’s Remy; did you forget to tell her I was taking you home?

Kemi hastily picks up her phone and explains the situation to Remy.

Remy: Don’t do anything stupid oh, you can’t let him take advantage of you in any way, I wish you had told me, I’m almost there now.

Kemi: He’s being way to nice to even dream of taking advantage. This is The Ex I fell for, the one I used to love. Don’t worry I’m fine.

Remy: I’m coming straight to yours now.

Kemi: Okay, see you soon.

They reach her house and Kemi and The Ex go into her apartment together so that the Ex can make sure she’s fully settled and take care of her before Remy takes over. Kemi remained inconsolable, fresh waves of tears taking over as soon as the old ones dried, try as he might The Ex could not console her or make her laugh. Her phone rang again.

The Ex: Oh Sola is calling you. Here.

Kemi stared at her phone blankly until it stopped ringing, it started ringing again and still she let it ring. She could feel the Ex looking at her confusedly, he had no idea what had just transpired between her and Sola. Even though she had no idea what Sola was calling to say, regret and injured pride would not allow her to pick up the phone and have him either shatter her dreams or elate her from this self-pity. She turned off her phone. Remy would ring the buzzer when she gets here.

Kemi: Sola is the last person I want to speak to right now.

She sits next to him on the sofa and allows herself to be comforted by her ex again. The boy who had hurt her so many times before now became her friend in this time of need. Looking up into his dark eyes, she felt reassured that tomorrow would be a better day still. And they kissed.

The End.

Staying Single Part 9: The Finale I

I have slight OCD and I just couldn't bear to have the series end on an odd number so I've split this last post into two. It also makes for easier reading I'm told :)

If you haven't been reading this from the beginning then don't ruin the ending for yourself, start from the very beginning. A very good place to start!

Part1: I Will Be Single! Will I?
Part2: Poor little Sola Boy
Part3: Return of the Mac or umm, the Ex?
Part4: Pure Carnal Lust
Part5: All Hail the Queen of Awkward Moments
Part 5.5: A Suitor, A Disciple & A Sola
Part 6: Cut Your Cloth
Part 7: The Number One Suitor
Part 8: In Love With S
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The Suitor sits in shock and Kemi sees in his eyes for a fleeting second all the hurt he tries to push down.

Suitor: I don’t understand. You told me you guys barely even speak anymore.

Kemi: We don’t, I don’t know, it’s just really complicated.

Suitor **visibly angry**: So how can you possibly be in love with him when you’ve spent the last 2 months with me?

Kemi has nothing to say and she is starting to regret this plan, she should have at least waited till they were out of the club, at his place or hers. Now this is going to turn into another of her world famous scenes.

Suitor: Oh so now you can’t speak? Kemi I need an explanation.

Kemi **lowering her head**: I don’t know what to say; I don’t know how this happened. I didn’t think you were taking us that seriously.

Suitor: So you think that me seeing you every other day, taking you out and spending money on you is just me being casual? **raising his voice** there’s nothing casual about that Kemi and you know it!

Kemi: Please stop shouting, can we just go. Lets go somewhere quiet and talk about this.

Suitor: Kemi please, don’t piss me off. There’s nothing to talk about, you’re just a stupid slag who uses people. I can’t believe I fell for you. You're a f*cking b*tch.

As he said those words, the music quietened down, one of those dips between one song and the next where you find that the voice you were speaking in was way too loud. The Suitor’s words had caught everyone’s attention and he got up and stormed out of the bar leaving Kemi sitting alone awkwardly. Glancing around and not seeing any friendly faces she got up and went hurriedly to the ladies. Seeing as I’ve already ruined things with The Suitor I might as well call Sola and tell him everything

The phone rung five times before Sola eventually picked up and with every ring Kemi was regretting her decision to call him, what exactly was she going to say? She hadn’t even given it a second thought before deciding to act so irrationally.

Sola: How far?

Kemi: **rambling on** Hey Sola, I know that you might think this is random and wonder why I’m deciding to just do it now, but I don’t know what’s wrong with me and I don’t know if there would ever be a right time to say it and everything is just so confusing in my head right now and I don’t know if I’m even doing the right thing because I know Nkechi is my friend and I’m being a terrible friend by doing this but I don’t think I can stand for you to not know any longer and..

Sola: Wait, slow down. What are you trying to say? I can’t even hear you properly.

Kemi: I’m trying to say that I love you, that I’m in love with you and I’m sorry it took me so long to realise.

There was a long silence on the phone after Kemi’s confession and for the first time she thought of the off chance that Sola really had moved on and didn’t care about her deeply anymore.

Wow, what have I done now? I don’t understand what’s wrong with me. Why do I always mess everything up with boys that genuinely care about me and treat me right? And then I end up acting a fool for the likes of the Ex. Kemi you need to get your act together.

Sola: Babe, let me call you back. Nkechi is waiting.

And with that he hung up. Kemi was left staring at her phone as it beeped the end of the conversation. She wasn’t sure if what had just transpired was real or if she was hallucinating. It was one of those out of body experiences for sure. The woman in the ladies was staring at Kemi who was staring at her reflection in the mirror.

Woman: You araiy gyal?

Kemi shook her head and the tears started flowing as she thought of the possibility of losing both Sola and the Suitor. Something that had never occurred to her before. She felt all the shame, regret and confusion rise from deep inside her belly, climbing gradually till it reached her throat and then she leaned over the sink and retched multiple times.

Sunday, 26 August 2012

Staying Single: Part 8- In Love with S



After the party is over and everyone has gone home, The Girls were all in Stephanie’s room talking about the gist from the night. Of all the not-so-shocking revelations such as Remy spending the whole time glued to Jide, the most shocking was the following:

Remy: So guys, everyone has casted themselves except Nkechi, are we really going to let this slide?

Steph: That’s true oh, where were you? You were ghost through almost the whole thing.

Nkechi: Hmm, you guys need to stop asking too many questions, I told you I was busy.

Remy: Busy doing what? Girl, it’s either you tell or you sleep in the corridor tonight! **laughing**

Kemi: I agree oh, spill the beans

Nkechi: Well if you must know I was just getting to know a certain Sholly-boy better.

Steph: Hahaha, you were with Sola?!

Kemi: Wait, which Sola? Sola Akinlaja??

Nkechi: Ahh, yes now. Which other Sola! And I must say, he knows how to get down if you know what I mean **laughs**

Remy: You you’re just a hooker, I’m tired please I’m going to sleep.

Kemi: Hmmm, Sola.

Steph: Ah babe what’s your issue?

Kemi: Oh nothing, it’s just funny that’s all.

Nkechi: I mean to be honest I don’t like the guy; he’s a bit young for me. He’s cute though! I know you guys are bestos but you’re cool right?

Steph: Of course she’s cool! After the story she was just telling us about the Suitor!

Kemi: Yea exactly, I don’t like him or anything.

Remy: **coughs suspiciously** Goodnight guys.

After the lights went off and everyone was trying sleeping, Kemi lay awake thinking about Nkechi and Sola’s rendezvous, was it possible that Sola liked Nkechi? Because she knew Nkechi definitely didn’t like Sola, and if he did then why her? And how far had they gone? And again why Nkechi? Lost in her thoughts Kemi admitted to herself that the fact that the girl was Nkechi wasn’t what bothered her, it was the fact that Sola was getting with people in the first place.

Why shouldn’t he be allowed to get with other people? So what he was saying to me all that time about liking me was just bull?Sola can’t be with anyone else, that’s not fair. The jealousy in her gut was unshakeable, even as she tried to daydream of her episode with the Suitor; she kept replacing his face with Sola’s. Do I actually like this boy or am I just upset he doesn’t like me anymore? After many hours of deliberation through the night, Kemi decides that she in fact does like Sola but now that he’s trying to get close to Nkechi what is she supposed to do?

But what about the Suitor? Well he’s leaving soon so it doesn’t really matter! Once he’s gone, she can work on Sola again, she can’t directly make him fall for her; she has to do it carefully, and with this resolved in her mind, she falls asleep.

15 days later
The weeks that had passed involved Kemi seeing the Suitor as many times as she liked, they had gotten physical a few times but nothing beyond the first time. She also met up with Sola at their usual spot in Café Rouge and he confessed to having “slight feelings but nothing serious” for Nkechi. Kemi had also told Remy about her feelings for Sola.

Remy: You don’t like him, you’re just plain jealous that he’s moving on. Don’t go and do anything irrational! Nkechi is your friend!

Kemi: But she doesn’t even like him, she said so herself!

Remy: I just think you’re being selfish. This is exactly what the Ex does to you whenever you start liking someone else and it’s not nice.

Kemi: Okay fine, whatever.

But Kemi wasn’t convinced, she was sure she liked Sola, no one understood her that’s all, she would prove to everyone that they are meant to be together. The perfect opportunity finally presented itself in the form of a Tuesday night at Juju Bar, none of the Girls were there, Steph and Nkechi who had another friend’s birthday party and Remy was being a boring housewife with Jide. The music was good and the drinks were flowing. Kemi didn’t mind though, there would be quite a few friends there. Seeing Sola seated by himself in the corner, Kemi positioned herself to make sure he gets a good view and begins to gyrate in a most seductive way to the voice of some dancehall artist, she can feel Sola’s eyes on her back as she moves. The Suitor, seeing his girl dancing by herself makes his way across the dance floor and grabs her waist. Kemi slows the dancing pace and eventually stops.

Suitor: Oh, why you doing this to me?

Kemi: **looking bored** my feet hurt, these shoes are kind of tight.

Suitor: Her feet are killing her I call it her shoe-icide. Let’s go and sit for a bit.

Kemi: **glancing over at Sola she realises she has lost his interest completely,** Why did this Suitor boy have to show up at the wrongest time! Now Sola is never going to take me seriously. slightly annoyed she turns to the Suitor, she needs to get Sola’s attention again, but not right now**

PAUSE
Now I must interrupt this story here, to let you, the readers, know that Kemi is not a bad person, neither is she a slag, well not really. She does actually like the Suitor but remember he was always a short-term solution. She’s just a vain, naïve girl who wants attention and to be loved.
CONTINUE

Suitor: So I’ve been thinking of something, I want you to be my girlfriend

Kemi: Wait what? How did we get here?? But you’re all the way in America, it would never work

Suitor: I know myself; I don’t need anyone else right now. Just say you’d try at least.

Kemi: **in a small voice** I can’t.

Suitor: Why not? I thought we had something good going?

Kemi: I really like you, don’t get me wrong. But I’m in love with Sola.

Friday, 24 August 2012

First Date Nerves- Response


So one of my favourite things to do in writing is to take a piece written from a male perspective and then re-write it from the female's point of view. I recently came across this amazingly detailed piece written by Tayo and I knew I had to accept the challenge! The original can be found here and more of his amazing stories/poetry can be found on his blog, TayoMichael. Enjoy.



He asked me out. Saturday he said. Saturday at 6. Just a casual link up, it doesn’t have to be a date. It took him long enough; he’s had the green light for a while. What to wear, what to wear? Are jeans too dressed down? A dress too dressed up? Maybe he hates yellow. I should go with black. Black leggings. Tan boots. Mickey tee. No, not Mickey, he might think I’m childish. Betty Boop? Too slutty. Gosh I hate my wardrobe. Where is my fairy godmother already? Nail polish is chipped. Hope he pays no attention to the detail. Mickey or Betty? Betty or Mickey. Come on girl, it’s 5.50. Too late to train it, call the cab. Make-up is acceptable right? Understated is always better. I pick Mickey, hmm how about Tweety?

6.00, I’m late already. He hasn’t text me yet. I wonder if he’s there. He did say he’d be a little late. Where the hell is that taxi? I’m starving, haven’t eaten all day. Quick, make a sandwich before the taxi arrives. Ham, mayo, bread. Phone rings. Taxi is here. Grab the sandwich. It’s chilly outside, should have brought a scarf. In the taxi now, I text my sister. “I’m so nervous, I really like him already!” Oh no, no no! This cannot be happening. There’s mayo on my leggings. My phone buzzes, it’s him “Hey, where are you?” Shit! I can’t reply just yet, I look a mess. Eyelids heavy with tears; blink girl, blink. You’ll ruin your face. Finally there. Overpaid the driver, no time to wait for change.

Jump out the cab, head straight to the ladies. Some water on my face would do right now. I wipe the stains, why won’t they go away! Frustrated. Exasperated. I just want to go back home. Breathe in, breathe out. I’m here now, too late to cancel. Text him back ‘I’m in the cinema’. One more slick of lip gloss and I’m ready to go. My hair looks crazy but it’s too late for that now. There’s a little girl in here, “Mummy, I want to look like her one day.” She says. She’s talking about me. I smile. I beam. I’m ready now. I think? Step out of the ladies and back to the entrance. Should I say hi or hey? Hug or wave? Oh Lord, my heart is doing 60 miles an hour again, I hope he can’t tell. I’m not even normally shy.

I see him. He’s literally yummy. Tall, dark and that boyish grin; oh boy. “Hi-ey!” My goodness, did I just cross hi and hey? Awkward hug, wave, shake thing. This is a disaster. “Sorry I’m late” he says. “Oh it’s okay” Do I let him know that I was late too? No. No point. What film to watch? I don’t know what he likes. Do I even know him at all? The silence is getting awkward. I wish I wasn’t so nervous. Butterflies in my tummy and cat’s got my tongue. Film doesn’t start for an hour. What are we going to do till then? My tongue is still paralysed, I’m starting to sweat. Oh small talk why have you failed me so? After what seems like an eternity, he says. “I want to show you something”. Show we something huh? Boys will be boys.

It’s cold outside. I really wish I brought that scarf. I cross my arms across my chest. That looks defensive. Uncross. Can I hold his hand? He might think me forward. At least he’s talking now thank goodness. I respond. We laugh. Laughter is good. I like boys who make me laugh. I like him. Walking side by side, why does the space between us feel so vast? It’s probably the cold air. But this is nice. He’s not too forward, such a gentleman. We’re still laughing. He’s such a joker. Playful shove. Finally we’re closing the space! I’m completely at ease now. “Where are we going?” I ask. “You’ll see” he responds. We get there. It’s beautiful. I must say I’m surprised. For a “London” boy he definitely has a softer side.

Film time now. Do we really have to go back and sit in silence? He’s paid for it already, might as well. Film starts. Silence I said? Far from. Elderly couples glaring at us. Hey! It’s not my fault I’m having a blast. The film’s boring, or maybe he’s just much more entertaining. He leans towards my neck, my heart’s going crazy again. I could have sworn he almost kissed me! No? Maybe next time then. Now that’s all I can think about, is he going to try or not? I hope he does. Pretending I can’t hear him, I lean a little closer. Come on, this is your signal. He wants to kiss me; I can read it all over him. Nothing. The moment’s lost now; he’s still being a gentleman. Almost too gentlemanly? Well I tried, maybe next time.

Film’s about to end. This can’t be over yet. I need more time. Definitely giving curfew a miss. I text my sis hurriedly ‘Is dad home yet? If not text me when he’s back’ ‘No, kk I will’ she responds. Score, I can stay out later. “How are you getting home?” he asks. “I don’t want to go, let’s walk” I say. There’s this space between us again. It took so long to break it last time. Again, can I hold his hand? Or is that far too forward? I breathe in deeply and reach out. I grab his hand. He holds mine immediately. Oh such bliss, I never want to let go. We slow down to a stroll and stop walking, watching the boats go by below the bridge. Does he know how much I want to kiss him? He can’t or else we wouldn’t be talking about boats. Resigned but happy, I squeeze his hand a little tighter. It’s been a while since I felt like this.

From nowhere, he holds me closer and leans in; I know exactly what is happening. Eyes closed. We kiss. Exhilarating! Completely exhilarating! His lips are warm, he tastes like Fanta fruit twist. Mmm, this was definitely worth the wait. He looks at me, I think I see my future in his eyes but I can’t be sure. Another kiss will tell. His arms go to my waist, mine to his shoulders. Perfect height, I don’t have to bend too low or tiptoe too high. We keep kissing; he’s amazing. I cheekily flick his tongue. My phone buzzes. That can only mean one thing, daddy’s home. I have to go. “I had an awesome evening” he says. “So did I” I reply. Heaven knows I don’t want to leave. This has been the best first date ever. Taxi is here. We kiss again and say goodbye. This time when he looks at me, I’m sure I see my future in his eyes. Perfect night. Perfect boy. Perfect time. Perfect personified. I’m ecstatic.

First date nerves? Pshh, they are such a waste of time.

Morenike.

Similar Posts:

TayoMichael: First Date Nerves


This post was written by one of my dearest friends, Tayo. I read it and loved the attention to detail and the telling of the whole story. So classic. I had to reblog it and also try and do a response which you can find here. Hope I did it justice, but for now, here's Tayo's piece.



Hands sweaty. Knees weak. Arms feel heavy. Ate barely 2 hours ago, butterflies in my tummy. I can’t control this feeling. Never been on a date before. Genuinely never met a girl like this before. She’s way out of my league, what does she even see in me. Will she understand me. Rhyming slang and a london accent. Will it annoy her? Look at my hair in the mirror. Suddenly need a new shape up. I should have cleaned my Vans.  Nah. I should have worn my Converse. My chinos don’t look ironed. Should have worn jeans. Such an idiot. Fuck. Sh’e gonna laugh at me to her friends. I feel like such a muppet. Should have shaved shouldn’t I. What was I thinking. Too late now. I’m here now. 20 minutes late. Never keep a girl waiting. School boy error number one. This could be the worst evening ever?

The cold air slaps my face as I stand outside the station. I needed that. Now to find her. I’ve never called her before. Do I text her? *sigh* I’m  a mess. Breathe mate, just breathe. Need cash, I’m supposed to pay for everything on a first date right? Why is this queue so long. Group of ladies in heels are laughing in front of the machine. Come on girls, get a move on! Look around anxiously, still no sign of her. Check my phone every 6 seconds. Why won’t she text back. Has she gone? I wouldn’t blame her. Who’s late to a first date. My tummy turns. I want to throw up. I close my eyes. Breathe kid. You’ve got this. My turn. Cash out. How much. Do I really need £50? Yeah just in case. Ok, lets find her.

Lips are dry. Can’t open my vaseline tin. This is awkward. My hands look dry. I just creamed them! Lick my lips and exhale. My phone vibrates. ‘I’m in the cinema’. Suddenly I wish she didn’t text back. I don’t want to go no more. Standing in the middle of the road. It’s now or never mate. A man brushes past me aggresively. That knocks me into life. Let’s go. Walking to meet her. I’m practising my greeting. ‘Heyyyy’. Nah, ‘Hey you alright’. Nah, ‘Hi’. They all sound moist. smh. Walking towards the cinema. I can see the door. Now my heart is racing. What should i do?! Full body Hug? Kiss her cheek? This is harder than I thought. [Yes it's my first time, don't judge me].

I see her. She’s stunning. Tall, slim and glowing. She smiles. I melt. ‘H-h-hey’. Half Hug, half I don’t know what to call it. Awkward. You idiot. Shocking is disrespectful to the word. That was apologetic. ‘Sorry I’m late’. ‘Oh its ok’. She seems so calm. We look at film times in silence. Thinking of a joke in my head to break the ice. You’re funny man! Say something. Nope. None. Zilch. Zero. Nothing. Kaput.’Nothing comes to my head. Film doesn’t start for an hour.’ Good! This isn’t how I want it anyways. I have a plan B . ‘i wanna show you something’ I say.

Outside. It’s chilly. Wanna grab her hand but I think its too soon. Nah mate. Way too early. There’s confident and there’s arrogant. Let’s be neutral for now. Be easy. Just talk. Don’t even remember if this is a date. Maybe she just wants to hang out. Fuck it. At least leave a good account of yourself. I’m better than this. We talking. She’s laughing now! Get in! I’m mocking her. Playful shove. 1st contact since the hug thing. Yep I’m counting. I’m calm. She’s responsive. Hasn’t touched her phone either. Can only mean she’s interested and there’s nothing to tell her friends about yet. This is nice. Pretty with a personality. What a touch. Reached ‘Plan B’. It’s always awesome. She likes it. Brownie points for me no doubt. Good work fella. This is going better than I expected!

Look at the time. Film time. Neither or us wants to stop walking now. But we go anyways. Film starts. Still talking. Laughing lots now. Whispered jokes. Concentrating folk hissing ‘shhh’. We laugh it off. Film sucks. Inches from her face. Do I lean and kiss or lean and miss. Is it worth the risk? Toss a coin in my head. Nope, can’t leave it to probability. Still skeptical. I actually like her. Rejection would make for awkward viewing. Not worth the risk I say. So I lean towards her neck in an ‘i’m yawning’ fashion. Smell her. Rihanna Reb’l Fleur. Yum. Wonder what she’s thinking..Wish I had more bottle. 100% attempt made to kiss ratio. I don’t wanna lose now. I can wait. Besides, I want the first one to be romantic. Sorta. None of that in the rain moist stuff. Just not in a cinema I guess. Perhaps a goodbye kiss? Yeah. Definately…..maybe. *sighhh*

Film over. Pretty decent in the end. Home time? I ask how are you getting home. Relucatantly. ‘I don’t want to go, lets walk’ she says. Can’t believe my luck. Look to the heavens. Thanks Big Man! Walking and talking, she grabs my hand, I clasp and don’t let go. Ectasy. Doing cartwheels in my head. Words don’t do my feelings justice. I’m guessing I should have done this ages ago. I’m shy. Bite me. Walking and talking. Clear dark skies. Perfect weather. Perhaps a touch cold. Her hand keeps my entire body warm. We stop at a bridge. Look aimlessly into the water and people walking on the river bank. I really want to kiss her. Just got to find the right moment. I know I’m going to. I just don’t know when. Devil on my shoulder – don’t bother you suck. Angel on my right side – ignore him, he’s a pest. Silence. She smiles. I smile. It’s not awkward but there’s a funny feel about it. We’re talking about boats. Really? Enough is enough. It’s show time boy.

I hold her and lean in and close my eyes; she responds. We kiss. [One finger skank. Gunshot salute]. WHAT!! Amazing! Seems like forever. Warm. Moist. She tastes awesome. Where have you been all my life. Lips part. She looks at me with’about time’ eyes. ‘I’ve wanted to do that all night’ I say. She laughs. We kiss again. and again. and again. I’m a good kisser I know that much. She’s not too bad either. Bite her bottom lip, she’s misbehaving with her tongue. Everything has fallen into place. Feels like a weight has been lifted. This definately should have happened hours ago! It’s alright I say to myself. I’m happy now. Perfect spot. Perfect night. Perfect girl. Perfect time. Perfect personified. I am buzzing.  ’I had an awesome evening’ I say.  ’So did I’ she replies. I’m planning my future with her already. Call me crazy. We cuddle. I don’t want to let go. Nights like these should last forever. I stare at her for ages. She is beautiful. We kiss again. I’m calm on the surface. Inside I have won the lottery and found the girl of my dreams. Home time. She has to go. Put her in a taxi. Not before a final kiss. If I died today. I’m calm. She’s drives off. I text my friend ‘pulled! haha x’. Home time for me. Best night of my life.
First date nerves?? Don’t know what you mean mate. This was all part of my plan ;)

Tayo Michael.

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