Staying Single
Incase you missed it, Part 1: I Will Be Single! Will I?
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What the heck does he want now?? She keeps staring at her phone until it eventually stops ringing, and even then she keep staring at it like she’s waiting for something to jump out of it. Today is just going to be one of those days isn’t it? She can feel it. After weeks of not talking to The Ex and trying not to Facebook stalk him more than 5 times a week, now he calls her out of the blue?? To say what exactly? It was probably a pocket dial anyways. Her phone beeps. Voicemail has 1 new message. Okay now she actually NEEDS Remy. Looking for the perfect outfit to say, I-like-you-but-I-don’t-want-to-be-your-girlfriend, is much harder than one would imagine! If the skirt is too short, it’s unfair to the boy. If the shorts are too tight, it’s unfair to the world. If she decides to be all “Sweat pants, hair tied, chillin with no make up on”, it’s unfair to Drake! Finally she opts for a casual t-shirt and jeans and hops into the shower.
It’s 1:30 p.m. before she arrives at Café Rouge; luckily Sola hadn’t been on time either so he’s only been waiting for 20 minutes. Imagine if I got there early, Silly boy. On seeing him she needs to remind herself why exactly she is about to decline this proposal. Sitting at the table, listening to music through his headphones Sola has never looked more divine. The sun reflects perfectly off his dark flawless skin and he has this cool look on his face, clearly he’s far far away. On seeing her he snaps back into reality from whatever daydream previously occupied his mind and delivers his most charming smile, capable of melting hearts. “Sola is just my friend, I do not need a man in my life to make me feel fulfilled. Repeat. Sola is just my friend, I do not need a man in my life to make me feel fulfilled. Repea-“
Kemi: Hey, sorry I’m late. My wardrobe went crazy on me.
Sola: No worries babe, you look stunning as usual. I already ordered you your usual.
**sigh** what an awesome almost-boyfriend he makes.
Kemi: So Remy told me about some of the stuff you said to her last night, is it..
Sola: **cutting her off** Yea, I wasn’t really myself, I don’t know why I did that.
Kemi: Oh so you don’t like me then? It’s funny how girls get slightly offended when the person that they thought liked them, that they don’t like, says he doesn’t like them. Complicated creatures we are I tell you!
Sola: **silence**
Kemi: Come on, you can tell me anything, you know that.. Sola?
Sola: You led me on and made me fall for you; now what am I supposed to do? I can’t just let you go.
Kemi: You are making this so awkward, I never led you on and I’m really sorry if you feel I did!
Sola: So all those nights you were crying on my shoulder and falling asleep in my arms meant nothing?
Kemi: This boy’s view on love is rather warped oh. I was heartbroken over the Ex, you know that!
Sola: Whatever, you’re just a b*tch who uses people because she feels like it.
Kemi: Wow. **gets up to leave**
Sola: Babe, I’m sorry, please don’t leave like that. I’m a bit out of sorts this morning.
Kemi: Just take your stupid flawless hand off me! I’m just not ready for a new relationship; do you think we can be friends?
Sola: I guess so. Although you make it hard for me when you keep wearing these skin-tight jeans. Pun intended.
Why cant everything in life just always be this simple? They fought, made-up and were haveing lunch together happily gisting about all the latest happenings in under 30 minutes. Sola flirts tirelessly and it’s obvious that he does infact have deep feelings for her. She keeps catching him staring at her in the most unusual way but she knows she’s made the right choice. Kemi really wants to tell him about the voicemail from The Ex that she still hasn’t listened to yet but it feels like the wrong time, so she resolves herself to marching over to Remy’s house so they can listen to it together.
**Three hours later**
Remy: Okay then play the voicemail now let’s see what the stupid boy has to say now after 1 month.
Kemi: Actually it’s been 2.
Remy: Okay just play it anyways.
She reaches for her phone and dials for voicemail
“Hey Kemi, ummm, sorry I didn’t know who else to call, I need your help and it’s kind of urgent. Call me back when you get this, um, yeah, bye.”
What? He needs my help?? What kind of help? Maybe he’s ready to apologise and beg for me back, we can live in a castle in the sky and have nightcaps every night! Hmmmm should I accept or not?
Her thoughts were broken into by Remy, ever the realist.
Remy: What does this boy want from you now?? He better stop with all his cryptic rubbish. You’re not going to help him are you? Kemi! Stop daydreaming about having his babies!
Kemi: How does she know me so well? Huh? Oh yeah.. Well let me see what he has to say first now, you never know. Our babies would be tall and have his perfect eyebrows and eyelashes. Oh the joy!
Remy: Dey dere! Ive warned you now oh. You need to keep trying to get over this boy. He’s no good for you. Infact, call him back while I’m here. I don’t trust you; you might start begging him to take you back now. Shioor.
Kemi: Okay madam smart-ass, I’d call him back now. Just be quiet, I don’t want him to get spooked because you’re around.
Remy: **rolls eyes**
Kemi: Okay shhh, it’s ringing. Let me put it on speaker. Be still oh beating heart of mine.
The Ex: Hello?
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